Intern

It's been a while. Tomorrow is my first day of intern. To say I'm nervous is an understatement. It's my first experience in an 'office' job doing something that is actually related to my field of study. That's weird. It really is. I'm really growing up.

I am so excited for this! This opportunity honestly was given by God. I'm so blessed, and I am so excited. But at the same time, I'm so nervous and scared. What if I am not competent enough? What if the people there don't like me? What do I do then?

Then I realise that I need to trust in the Lord to help me through this. He has always been there for me, and allowed me to experience new things confidently.
There's something terrible about growing up. It's like you become more scared to try new things. I remember when it was my first day of kindergarten. I waved goodbye to my mother so quickly and dashed into the classroom because I was ready. Well, I wasn't COMPLETELY ready but I knew that I could bravely walk in there and new things would not faze me.

Same with the first day of primary school. I marched into that classroom and put on the biggest smile I had and said hi to the first person I saw. It was all fine.

Then I remember secondary school. It's like when you become older, you become so much more self-conscious about everything around you and the people around you. It's a terrible feeling. I remember feeling so shy and found it difficult to talk to anybody. I had to wait for people to talk to me! It was horrible. It was the same when I entered polytechnic. It's really sad to see that enthusiastic little girl suddenly grown up and afraid to make new friends. It's the worst feeling.

Now, I find myself with another first. I can't let fear get to me. I have to brave this. I will get over the jitters and do a good job. I will do my best at my internship and experience new things head on. I can do this.

Don’t worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses every thought, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. [Philippians 4:6-7]