December

Wow, 2 posts in a day?
What a miracle!
But its a new month and I felt strangely compelled to talk about it.
It's December. It is officially December.
It's so scary how fast time flies, isn't it? I never understood that metaphor until this year came about.

I have to be honest here though: I don't like where I am at this point in my life and I feel myself ending the year on a sour note, which I really hope does not happen.
I can feel myself spiralling down and it isn't good at all. Especially you know what sucks? When you're totally aware of yourself spiralling down, but you can't, or won't, do anything about it. I don't know what's wrong with me but as I watch myself change (perhaps for the worse), I feel extremely angry at myself but I don't want to do anything about it.

You might say: Oh, but Nat, at least you're aware of it. The first step to recovery is identifying your problem! But if you identify it, and don't do anything about it, there is no way to take another step is there?

It's December. I don't want to end the year on a bad note. I absolutely REFUSE to end the year on a bad note. It's time I took matters into my own hands.
I'm going to start reading the Bible again. I am going to focus in church and make myself a better person. This isn't a New Year's resolution because I will break those.

This is going to be a Christmas present to myself because I would feel so much better about myself once this gets going and continues growing and help me grow into a better person.